The world around is beautiful when the world within you is peaceful. (Pinterest)
I used to believe that people who hurt me would eventually face the same pain they caused, or even something worse. I had this strong faith in the idea of karma — that everyone gets exactly what they deserve. Most of the time, I hoped that the suffering they put on me would come back to them in equal measure.
Whenever their hurtful words pierced through me, my mind would dwell on the thought of them hearing even harsher words in return. If their actions made me feel belittled, I hoped that others would do the same to them, so they could taste the bitterness they had served. This longing for retribution kept me tied to the pain and was making it hard for me to move forward.
I kept waiting for karma to catch up with them, convinced that it was just a matter of time before they faced the consequences of their actions. My belief in karma was so strong that I thought it would never miss its target.
But as the days passed, their lives continued on without apparent trouble or regret. Watching them seemingly live their lives effortlessly while I was stuck in a cycle of pain made me feel suffocated, as though I was being choked by my own frustrations.
It felt incredibly unfair that while I was grappling with the emotional scars they had left on me, they appeared to be enjoying their lives without a care. The more I compared their ease with my suffering, the more it fueled my sense of injustice.
It might seem harsh to admit that I wanted revenge. I wasn’t actively plotting or seeking it out. I was merely waiting for karma to work its course. But I came to realize that my desire to see them suffer was, in itself, a form of revenge. Even though I wasn’t taking any direct action to revenge, the simmering anger and bitterness I held onto — because the world still allowed them comfort — prevented me from having inner peace. It was as if my own anger was a barrier, keeping me from moving forward and living fully.
Gradually, I started to let go of these negative feelings. It wasn’t an overnight process. It took time and effort to release the anger and pain that had been rooting within me. Although forgetting was challenging, I began to understand the importance of letting go. God, knowing the deepest corners of my heart that He revealed to me the priceless lesson of forgiveness.
Initially, I thought forgiveness was simply about saying, “I forgive you.” But I soon learned that it was much more complex. True forgiveness requires not just words but a sincere release of the pain and hurt. I couldn’t genuinely forgive until I had completely let go of the lingering resentment in my heart. It was a difficult journey, but one that was necessary for my own healing.
I had to come to terms with things beyond my control and accept experiences that fell far short of my expectations. Accepting this was not easy, especially when seeing those who wronged me living their lives without an apology. It was a process of adapting to the reality of their continued comfort while I was still grappling with the past.
When I finally reached a place of acceptance and genuine forgiveness, I felt a sense of peace that was beyond compare. My heart was no longer burdened by envy or anger. And I realized that it was what I seek the most. Peace.
Now, I strive to approach whatever life brings with an open and accepting heart. If it aligns with my hopes, I will be thankful. But if they don’t, I accept that I have no control over certain outcomes and embrace them with open heart. This shift in perspective has allowed me to find tranquility and move forward with a lighter heart.
For every painful word and action that once left a mark on my heart, I have chosen to forgive. This decision wasn’t easy, but knowing that forgiveness leads to inner peace has made it worth the effort. I forgive not to seem saintly or to ease the burden of those who wronged me.
I forgive for my own well-being. I choose forgiveness to live a life of peace and to keep my heart free from bitterness. Forgiveness helps me move forward without being haunted by the shadows of the past. It means releasing myself from the chains of past hurts and opening the door to new possibilities of happiness and peace.
Because through forgiveness, I heal.
And through letting go, I allow myself to grow.
